Jesus Joins the Super Smash Brothers franchise.

1 : Anonymous2021/04/02 20:25 ID: mist5w
Jesus Joins the Super Smash Brothers franchise.
2 : Anonymous2021/04/02 20:50 ID: gt6gcyf

Man, another Magic Swordfighter...

ID: gt6j5yn

Nah man, he uses a friggen cat o nine tails to whip banking bitches, and strait up

(╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻

" Jesus Cleanses the Temple: He made a whip out of cords and drove them all out of the temple area, with the sheep and oxen, and spilled the coins of the money-changers and overturned their tables"

ID: gt6rq5y

Just remember: when saying "What Would Jesus Do?" remember attacking with a whip and overturning tables is ENTIRELY in canon.

ID: gt7q1c7

Jesus was an anti-capitalist

ID: gt7nam4

Naw He wins with just the brightness of His coming like in Revelations

ID: gt7xag9

Neutral B - Crown of thorns boomerang Up B - Ascend Side B - Charge an overturned table to flip toward an opponent Down B - Counter

ID: gt7gqs0

You live by the sword, you die by the sword.

3 : Anonymous2021/04/02 23:14 ID: gt6wjo3

Christ crosses the battle line

4 : Anonymous2021/04/02 20:35 ID: gt6eoyg


ID: gt6fgrg

Then he’s gonna just come back to life

ID: gt6h1g2

He only has two stocks.

ID: gt7g5oj

3 day respawn time

ID: gt6tscu

Surprised nobody has posted this.

ID: gt6lyzc

Depends on which one. We talking "turn the other cheek" guy or the guy who blew up a fig tree? The dude who intentionally died? Or the giant with legs of molten bronze welding a sword?

ID: gt6z1iq

Sword mouth Jesus has some epic moves.

ID: gt71200

does jesus get extra stocks?

5 : Anonymous2021/04/02 21:25 ID: gt6kd4h

Sakurai: "Unfortunately, we couldn't add all the color options we wanted since the Church insisted he only comes in one color. Please understand."

ID: gt833b0

"Hippie in a dashiki" Jesus, Ethnically accurate Jesus, Raptor Jesus, maybe throw in another biblical character like how Steve has Zombie and Enderman maybe Noah or Adam? Wonder what else we could get.

ID: gt82gzh

Korean Jesus or GTFO

ID: gt6vum8

Underrated comment right here.

ID: gt71i57

We have carried out an in-depth analysis of the reported comment but have found it is suitably rated.

Thank you for your diligent service.

6 : Anonymous2021/04/02 20:43 ID: gt6fj32

Lol. I can just see him batting people off the field with his cross. Or using his crown of thorns as a whip, or like a boomerang type of weapon. Maybe he could pull the spikes from his hands and feet and throw them.

ID: gt6gzrs

I assume he floats, and with the crown boomerang... Perhaps a Peach echo character? Now what would he pull out of the ground to hurl around? Sinners? Little imps?

ID: gt7ry6o

Plus wouldn't he just be able to revive himself every time he died?

ID: gt838j0

So... stock battle?

ID: gt80qay

Grab hits are headbutts with the crown

7 : Anonymous2021/04/02 21:11 ID: gt6ism4

Final smashes you with a crucifix and boulder tomb.

8 : Anonymous2021/04/02 22:58 ID: gt6uu8m

Lmao, is this like the Obi-Wan thing? Did they think that was actually a cross?

ID: gt7t0pa

I think it's actually the other way around. It's such a simplistic design that someone came up with it to respresent a cross without being aware it's also a popular symbol from a video game

ID: gt7x374

I mean, I could understand if it was in the proper cross orientation but this is clearly the smash bros symbol

9 : Anonymous2021/04/03 03:07 ID: gt7kdc4

This is at St. Thomas Aquinas Church in Indianapolis Indiana. I went there from kindergarten to 4th grade before I switched to a public school. Nice place. They hold a festival every year. Ironically everyone drinks beer right outside in the parking lot throughout the festival but whatever. Im pretty sure that it's the biggest school held festival in Indy? But I'm not sure. So yeah. Just thought I should mention this.

10 : Anonymous2021/04/03 00:14 ID: gt72wl9

He rises from his tomb to woop some ass

11 : Anonymous2021/04/02 21:16 ID: gt6jf3n

His "Ressurection" move is OP.

12 : Anonymous2021/04/02 22:29 ID: gt6rob0

I think jesus was in a fighting game where his weapons were fist-sized chunks of cross nailed to his wrists.

ID: gt7zixm

Literally just saw this on an episode of Outside Xbox. For those interested:

13 : Anonymous2021/04/02 22:43 ID: gt6t7sq

“One of the most popular fictional characters of all time is joining smash....”

ID: gt7f4hi

Wasn't jesus an actual person minus the powers and son of god stuff?

Looks like historically he was a real human, just the biblical stuff is pretty much false.

ID: gt7fq0o

Eh... Maybe...

The mythicist position has some support, it's possible the Jesus we hear about is an amalgamation of a bunch of wandering rabbis and people just attributed all the stories to one guy. In that case he wouldn't really be a real person.

It doesn't matter much either way though. Apocalyptic rabbis were a dime a dozen around that time, so the idea that Jesus was actually a dude who preached and pissed off the Romans enough to get crucified is mundane.

14 : Anonymous2021/04/02 21:46 ID: gt6mvez

Its actually tf2

15 : Anonymous2021/04/02 22:37 ID: gt6sjmg

Calling it now. The projectile is throwing holy water into the eyes of the enemy

16 : Anonymous2021/04/02 22:49 ID: gt6tu6r

He has to have 2 forms. The first is more mild and defensive, and the second is the absolute boss he is in Revelations.

17 : Anonymous2021/04/03 02:43 ID: gt7i252

"Jesus crucifies the competition!"

18 : Anonymous2021/04/03 02:48 ID: gt7ijka

Brawl theme plays

19 : Anonymous2021/04/03 04:17 ID: gt7quk8

I have the power of god and anime on my side.

20 : Anonymous2021/04/03 07:24 ID: gt8411r

Even Jesus made it before Waluigi

21 : Anonymous2021/04/03 07:31 ID: gt84g7r

Super Nailed Bros

22 : Anonymous2021/04/02 22:54 ID: gt6uf8i

Low tier character with a shitty backstory. I'll pass on that DLC thanks.

23 : Anonymous2021/04/02 22:31 ID: gt6rvy5

"A new challenger approaches"


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