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Right!
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10 years since this game came out and I still have this entire lemon speech memorized. Half the time I can't remember to pay my phone bill on time, but by god I remember this speech.
ID: gsp1h25ID: gsphhi8Happi Lemon cake day! 🙂
ID: gspb7p7I still have the Wheatley ghost story memorized, more or less, so you're in good company, at least.
ID: gspf0qmWhat story is that?
ID: gspiddlDo you know who I am? I’m the man who’s gonna burn your house down...with the lemons
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Yes sir mr Johnson!
ID: gsp6vkf"Say goodbye, Caroline."
"Goodbye, Caroline."
ID: gspc16rAnd before you fellas get any ideas, she’s married... to science.
ID: gsplvxzI laughed out loud when I heard that, as a tech support person, it was hilarious.
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They forgot to get their engineers to make a combustible lemon before they burnt the house down
ID: gsoz4nrLol right or did they finish it and we just never found it in the huge facility?
ID: gspcj0eThe engineers were busy building sentry turrets to kill the Black Mesa team!
ID: gspl8a7Fun fact - All lemons are combustible if you put a grenade inside!
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I was just talking to one of my friends about how amazing this game is. There isn't a single part I don't like. Wheatley and CJ are both hilarious. It's short and sweet, amazingly written and laid out, controls are on-point. 10/10.
ID: gsp9a4m"CJ"
Took me a while to realize you meant Cave Johnson and not GTA San Andreas
ID: gspavukAll you had to do was stop crushing up moon rocks, CJ!
ID: gspbkmjAperture Science. Home. At least it was before I fucked everything up!
ID: gsp9wpmI feel like Cave and I are buddies so I call him CJ lolz.
ID: gsp0g4dCouldn’t agree with you more!
ID: gspiludI need to play it again.
I haven't played it since playing through it in a single 12-hour session the day it came out.
I didn't even realize it had been more than a couple hours until my mom came into my room and asked if I was okay.ID: gsp521xYep. I'm playing the main campaign of 2 and that betrayal was something I didn't see coming.
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My wife has this hanging on our bedroom wall.
ID: gsp8m2sI used to have it hanging in my office at work.
ID: gspfumwThis is my computer desktop background. I got it the last time this was posted
ID: gsperu6I have this version in my office.
ID: gspbaxzI say “fuck lemons!” and bail.
ID: gsohivdThat’s awesome!
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Posting JK Simmons doing the lemons speech. His performance really made it special.
ID: gspdhstI prefer the in-game version with GladOS' commentary. The actual speech is a minute in, but the lead-up is good context.
ID: gspfsgq"YEEAH! Take the lemons!"
"Burning people! He says what we're all thinking!"
Oh, Caroline.
ID: gspq1kh"Oh, I like this guy!" Lol.
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All these spheres are made of asbestos, by the way. Keeps out the rats.
Let us know if you feel a shortness of breath, a persistent dry cough, or your heart stopping. Because that's not part of the test. That's asbestos.
Good news is, the lab boys say the symptoms of asbestos poisoning show a median latency of forty-four point six years, so if you're thirty or older, you're laughing. Worst case scenario, you miss out on a few rounds of canasta, plus you forwarded the cause of science by three centuries. I punch those numbers into a calculator, it makes a happy face.
ID: gsptnohThose of you who volunteered to be injected with praying mantis DNA, I've got some good news and some bad news. Bad news is we're postponing those tests indefinitely. Good news is we've got a much better test for you: fighting an army of mantis men. Pick up a rifle and follow the yellow line. You'll know when the test starts.
ID: gspvn8wJust a heads-up: That coffee we gave you earlier had fluorescent calcium in it so we can track the neuronal activity in your brain.
There's a slight chance the calcium could harden and vitrify your frontal lobe. Anyway, don't stress yourself thinking about it.
I'm serious. Visualizing the scenario while under stress actually triggers the reaction
ID: gspclfzScience isn't about why, it's why not!
ID: gspprn0Man I can still hear J.K. Simmons saying all this. His performance is excellent.
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"when life gives you a bunch of lemons, you gotta jam 'em down someone's throat until they see yellow."
-Frank Reynolds
ID: gsoi58u“And if some punk ass kid humiliates you, you've got to do the only thing thats left to do!”
ID: gspapwq"Huh?"
Frank Reynolds -
This was literally the best voice line segments of the game his rage over lemons and combustible lemons lol
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Thats quite hard to burn the lemons i dont belive anyone has even worked out the self ignition temperature of lemon juice.
ID: gsogs16Well Cave Johnson did say he was going to have his engineers create a combustible lemon. We just never find out due to the curse of 3 with valve.
ID: gsoj8veHalf-Life Alyx apparently got their gears going again for game design. I want to see a VR portal game
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The beautiful thing is, life never gave us lemons. They’re not a naturally occurring fruit, but a man-made hybrid. We gave ourselves lemons, and we said, “yes, we like these sour, acidic bastards, and we’re going to eat them 100 different ways, and we’re going to harvest their acid for 100 different purposes, because we’re the masters of our own destinies and the dynamic human spirit refuses to submit.”
So when you see a lemon, feel proud. We did that.
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Cave Johnson made incendiary lemons. He turned lemons into incendiary grenades. Life gave him lemons, and he made lemonades.
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I have a combustible lemons rant shower curtain. It's my favorite thing in my apartment.
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Yeah! He’s speaking what we’re all feeling!
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Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I'm the man whose gonna burn your house down - with the lemons!”
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Sad cave Johnson noise
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Hey....priorities!